The Nerd
by Code Name Gill
Summary: Menma and I are brothers. Yes! We fall in love with the same guy. Yes! This is clichéd, but it's a lot more complicated than that. This is not a love story. It didn't start out that way and it sure won't end that way. (NaruSasu, MenSasu, NaruSasuMen)
1. Chapter 1

I looked at the kitchen with disgust at the mess I had made. Once again I thought I could cook. The cake that I tried to bake now looked like a burned flapjack, and reeked of oven heat. There was cake mix all over the counter and icing littered the floor. Menma was going to kill me, was I could think. Shit! I had fucked up again.

Well it wasn't long before the smoke detectors also chimed in on my failure, there loud glaring alarms were sure to wake to my brother.

I hear him fiddling in his room, and within seconds he had opened the door. "Naruto, what the hell, man?"

I roll my eyes and tell him, "Go back to bed, man. I'm fuckin' on it."

"I told you, you can't bake." Menma proceeded to walk into the kitchen. That's the thing I hated about my brother sometimes, besides the fact that he's my twin. He was so pushy and assertive. Sure I wasn't the cleanest, but didn't give him an excuse to treat me like a child.

"Weren't you sleep." I said to his as grabs a towel and cleans the mess I made. He's black hair is slopped on his head and there are black circles around his eyes. He doesn't get much sleep without his pills, which I was sure he didn't take. Menma probably spent most of the night playing online video games.

"I tried." Menma said. "So this is what you try to do for our birthday, burn down the house." Our birthday was tomorrow.

"Well I wanted to get you something, but hey I lost my wallet yesterday at that party." I scratch my head, nervous, and give a cheerful smile to my brother. "You should come out with us tonight."

"You know I don't leave the house." Menma said.

"Well it's time you did. You haven't left the house since dad…" I trail off knowing that Menma had not left this apartment in three years, when they first moved here for college. He had been diagnosed with had agoraphobia, and the farthest he would go was to balcony for fresh air. "I know you're scared, but I come home everyday."

"That's your decision, Naruto." Menma said. "Everyone can't be like you. Some of us know how to bake a cake." He hummed as he threw my excuse for a cake in the garbage. "So what are you doing today?"

"Nothing much…" I begin. "Probably going to school then I'm going to drink myself to death. Maybe I'll come home."

"Oh you're going to bring another guy home?" Menma asks.

"Yeah. If you had blonde hair maybe we could pull a switcheroo." I smile at him. "Or maybe I can find another set of twins who are interested and have a brother who also doesn't leave the house at all."

"Who says I'm interested in guys?" Menma asks.

"Your porn search history." I chuckle. "Ever heard of private tabs?"

"You went through my laptop?" He asks.

"No. You told me I could use yours last week while mine was getting fixed remember." I reminded him. My computer was always breaking down, I should probably call mom and ask for a new one, but I didn't talk to mom much. It wasn't that I didn't like her, I'd just forget to call. Who wanted to talk to their mother everyday, especially after a long night at a college party, no mam.

But Menma, on the other hand, talked to her everyday. Any chance he could get to call mom, he would. Personally I thought it was annoying, because mom would never let me forget it. She'd always say "You never call, you need to be more like your brother."

"Maybe we could find you someone. Do they have an online website for people with agoraphobia?" I asked. I was very concerned for my brother. He had not had a real relationship with another human being since high school, and that was with a girl who was obviously lesbian. At least as far as I could tell. I had always been good at guessing people's seculaity, I have had a 99 percent success rate, although I think it's one hundred. I know Neji Hyuuga likes cock. I know it.

"No they have no such thing, I don't think." Menma said. "Although that would be a great idea."

"Well I'm sure there's online websites where you can find nice guys or girls…" I chuckled after saying girls. "To hook up with, or go on dates, or ones who like to have dates at their boyfriends houses with home cooked meals."

"Naruto I'm fine." Menma said. "I have my video games and I have Desperate-Soul-Eater to keep me company, fanfiction, you, and stuff. I have stuff that will keep me busy. I don't need a relationship."

"Okay. Okay." I back off. "I'm not saying that relationship will solve all your problem, I'm just worried is all."

"Naruto. We're twenty two years old. I don't need you to be worried about me. I already have mom down my back about living my life despite my disability." Menma said. "I don't want to go outside. I'm happier inside. I go out to that terrorist, isn't that enough."

"But you only go out for two or three minutes then you come back in." I sighed. "Maybe if you stayed out there a bit longer."

"Naruto I don't want to talk about this right now. Aren't you going to be late for class?" I look down at my watch. "Shit." I grumbled. "We'll talk more later." I go and grab my things.

"Sure we will." Menma called.

I tuck my things into my bag and head off to begin my day. Class was always a bore. "By Menma happy birthday." I said to my brother before I left.

"Happy Birthday." Menma said.

Walking down the hall I notice the door next to my apartment open. Someone new is moving in, I think. And on cue I see men carrying in boxes. Who will be our new neighbor I wonder? My last neighbors were quiet. For the longest I wondered did someone actually live there, until I met the old woman.

She was a sweet woman and she took a liking to Menma and brought him cookies every time she baked. Sadly she went off to go to a home, I needed to go visit her sometime. I should make a mental note of that.

Once I came out of the building the sun covered every inch of me from head to toe. I always loved the sun, and that's probably why I'd acquired a tan tent to my skin. My brother's skin was always more fair since he spent much time indoors. That's something I thought about often. Menma never got to get much sun inside of that place. Sure he'd get some because he'd go on the balcony for a moment or two, but other than that he'd stay in the house.

I strolled down the block and met Sakura at the end of the block. She was my classmate. She had the brightest pinks hair one could find. I'd known her since pre-school. She's the nicest person I'd ever met, but she also can be very stubborn. On the bright side she's a very persistent girl. That's why she was the best performing nurse in our major. I've never seen anyone give so much of themselves to something.

"Naruto. How are you?" She says with a wave. We began a stroll down the street.

"I've been swell. You?"

"Naruto. I've had so much work. My god. Isn't your head swimming with so much homework? My god. It thought Tsunade said she was kidding when she said this would be a difficult semester, but between this and my internship at the hospital it's killing me." Since Sakura was young she always teetered back and forth when she spoke. "Anatomy is the worse."

"I know."

"God. I would drop out if I didn't love it so much." Sakura said.

"Yeah. You gotta love it." I offered.

"What's wrong?" Could she since my low spirits. I'd just been feeling down about Menma. I can't force help onto my brother, but I hated to see him so wasted away in that room.

"Nothing."

"You seem unusually low in energy." That was true. Usually I was talking non-stop. Usually no one can make me shut up. "Are you sick? Did you not do the homework."

"I did most of it." I did try to do all of it, but I fell asleep and missing a couple won't kill my grade.

"Naruto. You've got to be better with your assignments. You don't want to be on Tsunade's bad side." She takes a breath.

"Of course." There's nothing worse than being on Tsunade's bad side. She was our professor and head of the nursing department. She is very kind, but she can also make life very difficult. She was also very serious about nursing.

"I mean you have to think of those kinds of things Naruto before you decide not to do an assignment." Sakura sighed. "You saw the way she chewed out Kiba on saturday." Kiba was studying to work with animals, but he shared in their anatomy class.

"Yes." That was a terrifying scene. Kiba actually cried. Of course I'm nervous, but there's nothing I can do. I haven't done the assignment.

"I can't let you look at my notes because that would be academic dishonesty and I'd rather not be kicked out of school." They take plagiarism very serious at our school. So serious that it's kind of annoying. Honestly I missed the highschool days where no one cared about sharing answers and teachers cared and were lenient. Now it seemed no one really cared.

It's what they call "real life." Real life is hard and no one cares if you fail because it's all your fault. That's real. That's true. And that Sucks.

"WE can buy sometime and you can do it before class maybe. Just be a little late. At least you'll have the assignment done. It isn't due till the end of-"

"Sakura. It's alright." She was stressing me out. "I'm cool. Just chill out."

"I don't know how one can be calm at such a time…" Sakura sighed. "I'll send a prayer your way and I hope everything goes well." Sakura smiled.

"Thanks and I'm sure all will be well. Now tell me about something else."

"Like what?"

"Your parents? How are they?"

"They are fine. My mother is a neat freak. She came to visit last weekend and was upset because my apartment was junky. I mean that's not my fault." Sakura said. "Sometimes she's so inconsiderate. I'm a nursing student with little time to even eat anything except for ramen let alone clean anything."

"I understand the struggle. I swear to god I would change my major if we weren't in our third year." Naruto shrugged.

"I love nursing. It's a passion."

"Do you want to be a doctor? Tsunade thinks you should."

"Yeah. I thought about it, but paying for med school is horrible. All the bills and if nursing is this hard, imagine what being a doctor would entail."

"It's all in the luck of the draw, I guess." I didn't know a single thing about becoming a doctor expect that it would take too long. I could personally never…

"It's your birthday tomorrow." Sakura chirped as we crossed the street. The streets were usually dead today. Sure there were a decent amount of people that if you'd never lived in a city you'd say that it's crowded, but for someone who'd been here for the last 3 years it was unusually slow.

"Yep." I smiled. My birthday is a special time for me, but I'm also sad I can't spend it with my brother. I rather not stay inside.

"You'll be the big twenty-one." Sakura beamed.

"I know. That means that I'll be drinkin without you, eh?"

"No way." Sakura wasn't turning twenty one till March. She talked about how she wished could buy her own wine, as she said it relaxed her. "I can't believe that I'm like the only one who isn't twenty one. Kiba, Lee, Temari, Ino, and Gaara are all twenty one."

"Ino is not twenty one." I laughed. "She doesn't turn twenty one till september."

"What?"

"Yes. She uses a fake ID."

"Well the more I know."


	2. Chapter 2

I finally finished cleaning all the cake that was caked inside the oven. That was a relief. Naruto did not clean. Honestly I can't recall when his room was last clean. Maybe when we first moved in three years ago. Three years ago seemed like a different time in my life. I was able to leave the house when I wanted and I drove. I hadn't drove in ages.

My licence needed to be renewed in less than thirty days after my birthday. Damn where did all the time ago. A while ago, I was just eighteen. I had the world in my hand and I planned on becoming an actor. Yes, I love the stage. Honest to god I watch theatre all the time on the internet when I can.

There was something about performing that made me smile. Sadly I could not study theatre online. It's a course that one had to attend in person. So I suffered and studied english. I don't hate english, but I don't love it either.

Really my grammar kind of sucks and I hate writing papers, but that was better than going outdoors.

I walk into my room and went back to playing the video game I was playing. Years ago if you told me I'd be a video game freak, I'd laugh and call you an idiot but after being in the house for so long I found it to be my only escape. TV had become a bore and reading only excited me for as long as it did.

My favorite thing to do was play online. I'd found so much solace playing games online. My favorite kind to play were fighting games. Tekken, Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter, Dead or Alive, and almost any fighting game on the market was my favorite. I could play them for hours. I liked shooting games as well and fantasy, but there was something satisfying about smacking people around.

Just recently in this new game I got, Call of the Warrior, some new fighting game that just came out and I found someone who was beyond cool. His name was Dark-Raven-Tsukiyomi, I call him Raven for short. He was probably one of the hardest people in the world to beat. He was the only person online who truly challenged me. He was so good I would've suspected him to have stayed in his room for two years with his only escape being his game counsel.

I wondered if he was online now. Usually he was on sometime in the morning and always at night. He was on before I went into the kitchen to see what Naruto had destroyed, but I didn't get a chance to catch him.

I go on and no luck. He's not online. Dammit. Honestly I was looking forward to kicking his ass with Karui. I had learned some new moves, and I can't wait to try them out.

 ** _Ring._** Out of nowhere my phone buzzes. I pick it up, knowing exactly who it is.

"Hi! Minato! How are you?" There was only two people in the world who called me. Naruto and my mother. I had theatre friends from my first year, but they had faded away. I didn't blame them. They're too busy with shows and homework.

"Hello mom. I'm fine."

"That's good." My mom's name was Kushina. She was a firecracker, with bright red hair to match. She was always smiling and she was one of the most happiest people I'd ever seen my life. "Menma are you excited for your birthday?"

"Yes."

"I might come down and see you." I hadn't seen my mother since early August. "Honestly. We can play board games and you can show me how to play _Call of the Warrior._ You know I ain't very good at these games, but I love to try playing. Oh and maybe we can order in-"

"That sounds great mom." I honestly didn't want to tell her no because who else would I be spending my birthday with? Naruto was probably going out with his friends and really the only friend I had was Raven, and I hadn't even told him my birthdate.

"I know." Kushina said. "I just didn't want you to be alone on your special day. I know your brother was probably going to go out and celebrate. I wouldn't blame him. He's the big twenty one."

"Yes. The big twenty one." I can't believe that I was going to be twenty one. Wow! Where did all the time go?

"I remember when I was twenty one. I ran the town doing wild things. No one could control me. I drank so much tequila that I was cut off from three bars in one night and kicked out of the club." Kushina laughed. "Good times."

"Sounds exciting." Hearing mom reminisce about old times was sweet, but also sad as hell.

"I swear to you that I had just bought some cat food last week and the cat has already eaten all of it. I think he's getting fat. Aren't you. My little Cubby wubby." She was talking to Shadow, my mom's cat. She got it when we left so she wouldn't be lonely. "He's got an attitude."

"Make sense."

"Menma. I miss you."

"I miss you too mom." I do miss mom. I wish I could come see her, but she knows I can't. I know it's stubborn, but I can barely muster the courage to get the mail or sit on the balcony let alone go out and see my mother. "Can I call you back?" This conversation was making me very uncomfortable. I never liked sharing feelings.

"Um sure. I need to go somewhere before I go to work anyways."

"Yes."

With that we said our goodbyes and she told me she loved me. I returned the sentiment and off we went. I couldn't go back to the game, so I traveled to the fridge.

 ** _BANG_ **. It was a nosy day next door. Maybe someone is moving stuff around or moving in. they were loud. Maybe that didn't know that everyone could hear them moving stuff. The walls were thin, but they weren't thick. A lot of time, especially in the hall one could hear a conversation that was taking place.

That was how I discovered the woman across the hall was cheating on her wife. That was a messy situation. The wife still didn't know. Oh well. That's life. I try to mind my business the best I can.

 ** _BANG._** Good god. What was that?

I go into the fridge and pull out a yogurt while the nose continues. Really? It was becoming unbearable now. I wondered exactly who it was and why were they making so much noise. So I slid over to my peep hole. Yes. I had a peep hole.

It was a small hole that was there since I first moved in, but I didn't feel the need to take it out. There were three holes. There was one that allowed me to see through the living room, one that allowed me to see in the bathroom and one that allowed me to see to one of the bed rooms.

I rarely used them, but sometimes it entertained me to be nosy.

I decided to used the hole into the living room. So I grabbed a chair, the hole was a little ways up the wall. Whoever put these holes in the wall was sure to do it where no one could see them.

I peeped in and saw a young man. He looked around my age and had silky white skin, juxtaposed to his clock-strikes-midnight black hair. Man he was beautiful. He had on a T-shirt, and a pair of short shorts. It was warm for october, but there was no way that he could be wearing those running shorts outside.

"Wow." I licked my lips, my eyes tracing down to those beautiful pair of silky legs. He must lotion them all the time. They were muscular and caught the light like diamonds. Of course I wanted to keep my mind of the most important thing which was what he was doing, but I had to admire a beautiful person.

He, as I suspected was moving in.

Another person joined him in the room, a tall man who looked like a taller version of him. He had the same hair, but it was longer and two birthmark lines that set under his eyes. He was beautiful too.

My tongue ran itself over my lips again and I began to feel my blood rush to a certain area of my body.

 _Were they related?_

The thoughts filled my head about what I would do to each of them if I could? Honestly I hadn't seen a beautiful piece of ass like this since I dated a guy named Neji Hyuga. Neji was a long haired brunette, who I dumped after my father died. I felt bad because I couldn't spend time with him and I knew he was only holding on because he felt bad for me. I still think about him. I love him.

They began to talk. I become curious since I could barely hear a word.

I quickly run to my room and grab my stethoscope. I put it too the wall and I peak with my eyes.

"Hey, Itachi." The shorter one with the silky legs said. So the tall one with an ass I want to spank is Itachi. **CHECK!** "Don't put that blue shark stuff on the walls please. I hate that color. Just because your boyfriend gave it to you doesn't mean I have to see it everyday. Put it in your room."

"I'll do what I like little brother." The guy known as Itachi, the one with the great ass, said. _Oh sweet glory of god, say his name._ "When you pay rent-"

"Okay I don't want to hear that again." The silky leg sex kitten said.

"Alright then quit making me say it." Itachi gloated. "Now. Where should we put the vases with the flowers? I think sitting on table in the dining room…"

"I don't know. There's so much space." The midnight haired, silky legged sex kitten responded. "It's a lot of space." The apartment next door was a two bedroom and it looked beautiful. I had seen it two years ago when I first moved in. It had a dining room and the setup was loft like. It had big windows and it was open. The kitchen living room and dining room was all one big open space that could easily accommodate a lot of things..

"Uhhh." I sighed. "Say his name. What's the silky legged one's name?" I want to know his name so I can put a face to him. He's pretty.

"I hate this stove. We might get another one."

"It came with the place." The midnight haired, silky legged, delicious sex kitten replied.

"Yeah that doesn't mean it's a good stove." Itachi said. "It's questionable that the people who lived here before us didn't take it with them. It must mean that they didn't even want it anymore, Sasuke"

"Such a snob Itachi." The raven haired one had a name. Sasuke!

 _Sasuke. Itachi. Sasuke and Itachi...yes. BEAUTIFUL!_

"Ehhh." The glass spilled from my hand and broke on the floor. "Dammit."

Well there goes my snooping for today. All this spying had made me horny and hungry.


End file.
